Why is it when summer hits the average driver's IQ drops by about 20?
And it's only the ones with AC. Those of us driving without seem to be plenty competent.
5/31/2012
2 Losers, 0 Winners
Got passed by a sport bike and Ferrari racing down 215 a few days ago. The sport bike seemed to be in the lead, but the real winner was the NHP trooper who shot down the on-ramp and launched into the race behind them.
World War Ant - III
After boiling the ants, I thought all was well. No sign of ants for about a month.
Then I checked my mail one day and noticed a small hole in my driveway. Odd... Stopped to take a look and a bunch of ants ran out of it. Yeah, turns out that boiling them just moves the problem.
Okay, now they've chosen to ratchet things up a notch. Can't have them chewing up my driveway. So I discussed it with coworkers again. The subject of diatomaceous earth comes up. Diatoms, man, that's the answer. Lots of diatoms.
I dumped a bunch around the ant holes I could see. A week later, ants are still happily running about.
So I dumped a bunch more in a wider area. And in the ant holes for good measure.
A couple weeks later I couldn't spot any ants coming out of the driveway. Yup, I'd finally won.
Then I checked my mail one day and noticed a small hole in my driveway. Odd... Stopped to take a look and a bunch of ants ran out of it. Yeah, turns out that boiling them just moves the problem.
Okay, now they've chosen to ratchet things up a notch. Can't have them chewing up my driveway. So I discussed it with coworkers again. The subject of diatomaceous earth comes up. Diatoms, man, that's the answer. Lots of diatoms.
I dumped a bunch around the ant holes I could see. A week later, ants are still happily running about.
So I dumped a bunch more in a wider area. And in the ant holes for good measure.
A couple weeks later I couldn't spot any ants coming out of the driveway. Yup, I'd finally won.
World War Ant - II
I'd chosen to let the ants live, since they probably play some vital role in a functioning ecosystem. Damn if I know what it is, but c'est la vie.
A year later I noticed a pretty significant ant nest in some open ground. I figured it was probably best if I get proactive and do something about it. At work the next day I talked it over with some coworkers. One of which was, literally, a wise old man from China. No, really. His contribution: "Back in mainland China, we used to pour a pot of boiling water down the ant hole. No more ants."
So that afternoon I started boiling water. Slowly poured a pot of it down the ant hole. No more ants.
The next afternoon I surveyed the battlefield. Damn, they were back.
So I started boiling water. Lots of water. Poured it all down the ant hole. No more ants.
Next afternoon, ants back.
This time, much water. Much much water. No more ants.
Next afternoon, no more ants.
Next afternoon, same.
Same.
After a week it looked like I'd won and gotten rid of the ants.
A year later I noticed a pretty significant ant nest in some open ground. I figured it was probably best if I get proactive and do something about it. At work the next day I talked it over with some coworkers. One of which was, literally, a wise old man from China. No, really. His contribution: "Back in mainland China, we used to pour a pot of boiling water down the ant hole. No more ants."
So that afternoon I started boiling water. Slowly poured a pot of it down the ant hole. No more ants.
The next afternoon I surveyed the battlefield. Damn, they were back.
So I started boiling water. Lots of water. Poured it all down the ant hole. No more ants.
Next afternoon, ants back.
This time, much water. Much much water. No more ants.
Next afternoon, no more ants.
Next afternoon, same.
Same.
After a week it looked like I'd won and gotten rid of the ants.
World War Ant - I
As far as the critters in my yard go, I'm normally one to live and let live. They do their thing, I do mine, we all get along. I also try to avoid spewing chemicals all over my living space, 'cause, ya know, health and all.
Until one day when the ants came. That's when the world changed.
I'd just finished laying floor in a bedroom, and was cleaning up the tools in the back yard. Last thing to do - move the table saw from the back patio into the garage. Being summer, I was wearing shorts and flipflops. I picked up the saw and waddled my way around the side of the house. Then I felt a pain on my foot. And my calf. And knee. And ankle. I hastily dropped the table saw, looked down, and immediately did the skin slapping crazy dance as I noticed my lower legs were covered in ants.
Those little fuckers pick the worst times to attack.
That was the first offensive, and I believed them when they said they wouldn't attack any more countries. The Kaisant, one convincing guy.
Until one day when the ants came. That's when the world changed.
I'd just finished laying floor in a bedroom, and was cleaning up the tools in the back yard. Last thing to do - move the table saw from the back patio into the garage. Being summer, I was wearing shorts and flipflops. I picked up the saw and waddled my way around the side of the house. Then I felt a pain on my foot. And my calf. And knee. And ankle. I hastily dropped the table saw, looked down, and immediately did the skin slapping crazy dance as I noticed my lower legs were covered in ants.
Those little fuckers pick the worst times to attack.
That was the first offensive, and I believed them when they said they wouldn't attack any more countries. The Kaisant, one convincing guy.
So there I was, driving home,
minding my own business when I rolled up on a big ole pile o'stupid. Merging, man, it's just so confusing for so many people.
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